lolita

bongalong

lunchables cheese is not cheese.

i’m in love with a guy who barely knows i exist.

cuz in this moment i just feel so alive

all i can say is…disappointment. i met this guy, he’s a tool. the end.

SOO on a side note, life is h a p p e n i n g.

               i’m totally blazed. totes.

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dino-chrissy:

I want to feel that good right now…

blue moon

i never post. every once in a blue moon.

i wish i could commit to it. and have this amazing blog that all these people would read and then i’d become like famous and shit. just a poor girl living in a dream world.

today i waited on this guy — errr…woman? — guy? it…with three missing fingers on one hand. strange. then these chola girls having their own little chola-ed out jersey shore episode. “jose’s ma said me an javier smooshed. we di not smoosh!” with their tattooed eyebrows. ouch.

i love my job. i love my life. i love myself, i fuck myself, i feed myself.

i have this woodwick candle. you know one of those cool ones with the wood wick. at least i’m pretty sure it’s wood…anyway, when you burn it, it makes this cool quiet crackling noise and kind of a hum/buzz sound. it’s strange but it really does have this calming effect…OK maybe i’m just high LOL. point is, what i’m trying to get at here is normally i love this sound (i’m obsessed with certain sounds - wow way to have 10 million bagillion thoughts at once) BUT RIGHT NOW it’s making this horrible buzz and it sounds like a bee and it’s freaking me out. bees freak me out. bugs freak me out.

the other day i went out on my lunch break and was driving to get something to eat when i realized there was a BEE on my dashboard, really close to the windshield, alive and trying to fly away and i fuh-reaked out…almost causing an accident. finally i shooed it out the window. talk about congestive heart failure. LOL.

speaking of CHF, Elizabeth Taylor died today. i don’t know why i’m mentioning this at all really. all she was to me was another broad who was really pretty when she was young but then turned into a man-looking-woman who’s a regular at walmart. ummm maybe that was a little too far? LOL. whatthehey.

SO…i google “smoking tube” because it’s this thingamajig - http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=smoke%20tube - just supposed to clear the room of weedsmell, right? well all that comes up in the search is a bunch of porn sites. WTF, seriously right now?! apparently a lot of people have smoking fetishes LMAO. i cannot believe these here internets. what is the world coming to?

paint the town green

Jeez blogging is so hard. Mine has no consistency. Is that the word? I mean I’ll update about once every six months or so. I write better in my journal…it’s just easier for some reason. I think about stupid shit. Weird shit. All the time.

I was smokin outside and I thought, you know this smokin outside stuff is probably a good thing cuz I can get out and breathe. Then my ass got so cold from sitting on the concrete steps that I was imagining it melting off. I started getting paranoid cuz cars kept passing by and I imagined what I would do if a cop came up to me, “Excuse me, miss, is that weed you are smoking?” “Yes officer. Occifer.” “Do you have a license to smoke that?” “Nope, sure don’t.” “Can I have a toke?” Puff puff pass. There’s this really cool view from the front steps. Makes me feel like I’m in The Exorcist and National Geographic all at once. Long story.

Anyway, I’m a year older. 24 & so much more.

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like your love handles.

brrrrrrr

baby, it’s fuckin cold outside.

i thought about folding laundry, then i thought again. why not waste time blogging in a blog that no one will read when it takes you an hour to come up with something worth reading in the first place? riiiiiight? hmmm where’s the logic in my logic? i lose.

soo today i waited on some mega douche that i thought “i def need to write this down and/or share it with someone cuz it’s def worth sharing and should be remembered cuz…yeah…” then i forgot. but i do remember some mexican guy with a WIC check that was already signed…(which you are not supposed to do rather, i am not supposed to process…but i did) and uhh anyway it was for baby food and formula so i thought, what the hell, this guy needs it that bad, he must really have a hungry baby and i should go ahead and do it. we’ll see if i am reprimanded (most likely) but, what do you do. you let the mexican have his formula. because he wasted all his money on meth. JAYKAY i am so prejudice. or…what’s the word? i dunno. he didn’t look like a meth head.

ANYWAY - glad i got that off my chest as it was surely important -

in other news, losing weight is the biggest struggle of my life and boy do i enjoy complaining about it. i think about food all the time, for serious. the first day of my “diet” (it’s not a diet, it’s a life change…B.S.) all i could talk about was donuts (mmm…DONUUUUT) and hamburgers and fries. i’m a true fatty, since the day i was born, and i’ve been trying to make it go away since then but it’s easier said than done. some days i feel like screaming, breaking down and crying, choking someone, etc. but life goes on and i’m proud to say so far in the last two weeks i’ve lost a total of 5 lbs. and haven’t killed anyone yet. go me! 5 lbs. kinda sounds like nothing, but if you think of 5 pound packages of hamburger, that’s a lot. so what i’m trying to say is, even though you may feel like you want to die, this is not the end, from a fatty to fellow fatties: YOU CAN DO THIS. DO NOT GIVE UP.

speaking of fatty…pass that dutch.

sometimes

my brain turns to mashed potatoes.